Practical Guide to Birthday Parties

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It’s that time of the year again! You little one is completing one more spin around the Sun and they’re a completely different person. Last year it was dinosaurs, this year is all about Blippy! Who can keep track of what’s trending at their age anymore?

Organizing a birthday party is not easy, but putting a project manager hat on can help you make sure nothing falls through the cracks. Here are some tips I learned through my experience as a mom:

1. Start planning early - I would recommend about 2 months in advance.
2. Think about the weather. If you live in a place with cold winters or unpredictable June weather, take that into consideration when choosing the location for the event. If you choose an outdoor location, make sure you have a plan for rain or snow. 
   
   1. If possible to have a backup location like your house or an indoor playground, you can mention that in the invite details.
   2. You could consider renting a tent for rain or strong sun.
3. Talk about the guest list with your kid. In the first couple years of their lives, kids might not care much about who comes to the birthday party. As long as there’s cake and gifts, they’ll be happy. I noticed that around age 3, they start forming friendships with neighbors, relatives and school classmates and can have strong opinions about their guests. As a rule of thumb, try to invite all their class from daycare/school and ask about any other friends they’d like to invite (from sports classes, neighbors, etc). Assume a 50-70% acceptance rate for the invitations to calculate the total number of guests. Also assume some kids will join with their siblings and maybe both parents.
4. Book the venue. Once you’ve decided on an indoor or outdoor location and have a rough estimate on how many people might join the birthday party, make sure you book the venue in advance and read the cancellation policy, just in case you need to adjust plans. For a list of our favorite Bay Area locations for birthday parties, see our list here.
5. Secure the food. I am not a big fan of the food usually served at kids birthday parties (pizza, fries and chips) but understand that they are convenient options that children usually eat. Some less conventional options could include trays of rice, chicken, beans, lasagna, chicken wings, cheese, fruits, pigs in a blanket, savory buns, onigiri (Japanese rice triangles), scrambled eggs, sliders, flatbread pizzas, lumpias, taquitos, arepas, potstickers, falafel, humus and pita, meatballs, hotdogs.
   
   1. Try to have some vegetarian and gluten free options.
   2. Since most kids' birthday parties happen in the morning or early afternoon, I recommend bringing coffee and tea for the parents - we all need a little pick me up to be in a better mood.
   3. Avoid nuts if possible to limit risk of allergic reactions
   4. Choose juices with lower sugar content and less processing if possible
   5. Food with no sauces means less mess, which everyone will appreciate
6. Let them pick a theme. This one can be easy peasy or a lot of back and forth. My suggestion is to ask your kid if they have any preference, give them some examples and a time window for their decision (for example a week). Once they choose a theme, show them a few decorations that would go well to confirm your visions are aligned.
   
   1. Some items that might be on theme: table cloth, napkins, plates, cups, party hats, party favors. 
   2. My recommendation is to focus on a few large items on theme and keeping the others generic (for example streamers with the theme, but white paper plates). 
   3. Balloons are always fun, but can fly away and are hard to reuse. Consider paper banners and streamers instead! 
   4. Party favors are becoming a whole industry nowadays. Most of the kits you can buy online have small items that are not very entertaining and can be choking hazards for younger siblings. What I’ve seen as very helpful is small sets of crayons, stamps and coloring books that can be used as “on the go” entertainment in restaurants, on planes or in the waiting room at the doctor’s office. Temporary tattoos, personalized sunglasses and playdough are also great gifts! Another option would be to take Polaroid-type pictures and send them home with your guests as a souvenir from the party.
7. Send out the invitations! To make sure people can make it, try to send the invitations out about a month in advance. Keep in mind that some emails might make it into people’s spam folder, so check in with guests to make sure they got the information. 
   
   1. In the invitations, give some tips about parking, need to bring extra layers, any activities that are available or tickets that you expect the parents to buy (although not recommended to host an event where tickets are needed). 
   2. You might want to add a note if you would prefer no gifts were brought or there is a registry set up.
8. Think about entertainment. Parties where face painters, clowns and balloon artists are available are great, but not everyone can afford that level of entertainment. Having a face paint kit at home has entertained my daughter and her friends many times, although none of us are talented face painters. Temporary tattoos, bubble machines or wands, slime kits, playdough, chalk and coloring sheets are all great options for kids. Musical chairs, soccer balls, balloons and stomp rockets are also great to have around. A wagon could be great to help you bring all the supplies.
9. Day of checklist:
   
   1. Venue reservation information
   2. Cake or alternative celebration modality (cupcakes, pinata, etc.). Don’t forget the candles and matches or lighter.
   3. Plates, cups, napkins, paper towels, forks, spoons, trash bags
   4. Birthday decorations (table cloth, balloons, streamers)
   5. Goodie bags (if any)
   6. Music setup (speakers)
   7. Layers or a change of clothes for the birthday kid
   8. Entertainment (toys, chalk, etc.)
   9. Water jug
   10. Coffee and tea (if any)
   11. Food and drinks 
   12. Extra sunscreen
10. Following up. If you have a moment, send a note to the families who showed up, thanking them for their presence (and presents). It’s always nice to send pictures if you have some!

The most important thing is to focus on having fun and not on making the event “perfect”. Your child might get overwhelmed, tired, and grumpy. They might throw a tantrum or say something mean. Try to get to the reason for their behavior and address it. Sometimes just repeating that “it sucks the balloon flew away” is enough to help them process and move on.

In the end, your child won’t remember the plates were the wrong color. They’ll remember the fun they had with their family and friends. Be kind and remind yourself you’re organizing a birthday to celebrate the biggest gift you got a few years ago.

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